I’m not sure whether my list of things I want to do in 2014 could be referred to as resolutions, more like plans for the year. I’m terrible at making resolutions and breaking them within days, so maybe removing the word ‘resolution’ will help – or maybe that’s just wishful thinking.
Last year I had a whole list of resolutions, the point of many were to make myself happier after feeling myself slip into depression especially towards the end of the year. I hate to say it but I was bottom of the pile again and only one of my resolutions – to get my website off the ground, saw fruition, although even that has been neglected of late. I’d have to say my goals for the year are pretty much the same as last year. I am not happy. I hoped our recent house move would help and be a fresh start for all of us, but there have been so many problems since we moved in from all the white goods breaking to having no internet or phone, no hot water – the list is endless, that I have probably been more depressed since moving than ever. I haven’t had a chance to enjoy living here because of everything that has gone wrong which also had a knock on effect on Christmas and was inturn awful for me for the third year in a row. I’m fed up of putting a brave face on it, I want something to go right just for once. I’m sick of fighting for everything.
My plans for the year are:
- Lose weight – Yes I say it every year and no I dont end up doing it. But I’m determined this year will be different. So determined infact that I bought an exercise bike, which arrived this week and is waiting to be put together tonight. I lost 4 stone a few years back eating healthily and working out on my exercise bike and this year is my year to lose weight and look and feel better about myself. I’m 32, I should be wearing fashionable clothes and whizzing about but I’m fat and frumpy and am sick of being so self-conscious that I’m nervous leaving the house. I used to model, now I look like I’ve eaten a model. My friends have lost weight and look better than they have in years. I want the same to be said about me.
- Get a cleaner – Bit of a weird one, but I get little or no help from the kids or the man around the house and I’m fed up of it. My back is also often so bad that after an hour of cleaning I’m in agony for a week so having someone in just once a week to dust, mop and hoover through will be like a godsend for me and hopefully free up some time for me to fit in some work or paint my nails – sounds silly but not when you haven’t even filed your nails since about March last year!
- Learn Spanish – Another one I keep saying I’ll do and never get round to. This year I will get more than just a basic grasp on the language. I can read it, I can even understand the majority of what people say to me, it’s just that my brain doesnt connect with my mouth and I can’t seem to speak it very well. Whether I get a tutor or go to an adult education centre again, I’ll definitely be picking up where I left off a few years ago.
- Get Crafty – I found that crochet helped me relax and block out the annoyances of every day life towards the end of last year and I’m keen to pick up where I left off and perhaps try a new craft every once in a while too. I’ll never be an artist in any way shape or form, but I can at least give it a go.
- Me Time – Another one I trot out every year, but whether it’s taking time to write blog posts, read my new kindle, paint my nails or relax in a bath. I have to start taking care of myself.
I could no doubt think of a hundred more but five should be more achievable than a huge long list. Wish me luck while I keep my fingers crossed for a healthier and happier 2014!
P.S I hadn’t quite invisaged the way this post ended up but I actually found it quite cathartic so I guess that’s a win in itself.